Everyday Tidbits...

Be Kind. Do Good. Love is a Verb.

Saturday, December 9, 2017

#WeekendReflections 12/9

Looking outside...it's cloudy and cold. It's currently 22.

Listening...to Christmas music. The Doctor is home from seeing patients. The boys are up and about. We talk and laugh a lot. I love it.

Loving...Thursday and Friday evening, the Artist participated in the Theater Showcase at school. All of the theater students presented the projects they had worked on this year for district competition. The Artist did set design, an ensemble piece which was a scene from the musical Chicago and a pantomime. 

I loved watching him on stage. His solo pantomime is amazing. And his ensemble scene was awesome. I love observing him with his friends and peers. He has made good friends at school and more in his theater classes. It has been a joy watching him overcome some of his natural trepidation in performing. 

Thursday night after his pantomime performance and after the show was over, he was so hyped and excited. It was a delight to see. And I am so impressed with all of these kids. Seriously. there are some talented students and some truly fantastic pieces performed.

Thinking...that I really need to get my Christmas shopping done/ordered/wrapped.

In my kitchen...Crio Bru. They have a peppermint flavor that is amazing, especially if you add a Dark Chocolate Peppermint Truffle to it... Not sure about dinner. 

Wearing...fuzzy yellow minion jammies, black turtleneck and black slippers.

Reading...Let's just not talk about it.

Today...I am working on a handmade Christmas gift and paying bills. The Artist is going with Grandma and his cousins to buy a toy for Toys for Tots. Each year, she takes the grandchildren to the store and gives them each a set amount of money to buy a gift and then they give it to the very nice Marines who are standing at attention near the donation boxes. The Artist loves doing it. The Boy is working this afternoon/evening. The Doctor is at the office, but we have office business to do this afternoon.

Quoting...“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.” ― Bruce Lee

Feeling...tired. Still weary, but working through issues of my own.

I have decided that expectations suck. We all have expectations. You can deny it all you want, but you have them. I have them. We expect people to behave in certain ways. We expect our children to do specific things. We plan activities or events and we expect that they will follow a precise pattern. And then, when those expectations are not met, we are angry. It's hard to let perceived slights go. We lash out. We hold grudges. We get feelings hurt.

Do me a favor the next time some of your expectations aren't met. Ask yourself why you are reacting the way you are. It's unlikely that the person who didn't meet your expectations did something heinous. They just did something that you didn't want or anticipate. But did they even know that you had assigned an expectation to the event or their behavior? Probably not. So ask yourself why you're so annoyed and then let it go. I'm trying to do that and it's difficult. But I am learning that finding the Why in anything is important. I have my husband to thank for that. He has an amazing way of helping me shift perspective.

I don't think there is a person alive who doesn't have some kind of personal or emotional issue to work through. Everyone has them. Every family has them. There are no perfect people. There are no perfect families. No matter what people portray on social media or on Sunday at church. Trust me. No one's life is perfect. 

Someone's trials might seem petty or trite compared to your own, but to them? Those trials might be overwhelming. And you probably don't know the depths of their struggles. You're just on the outside looking at what might be the fragile pieces of their sanity, still holding together a shell of calm, despite the fractures that keep appearing in it. So if they didn't meet your expectation? Step back and give them the benefit of probably having a good reason. Like I said, I've been trying to do that more. Sometimes the self-reflection that follows isn't always comfortable.

Have we become so selfish that we think everything is about us? A post on Facebook by a friend or acquaintance suddenly seems like a personal attack. When, in reality? It's just something that person posted. A thought or experience that radiated with them. It has nothing to do with you. If you think it does or it resonates with you, ask yourself, "Why?" and reflect. You might not like what you see, but hopefully you will learn something from it and gain a better understanding of someone else. And, you don't have to comment on any post you disagree with. Did you know that? You can move past it. Try it some time. It's not easy. I actually did it yesterday, because I realized that the reaction I had to a comment I made, was my own and the person replying wasn't directing anything towards me. But, it's not easy.

If you invite someone to an event, don't be offended if they don't come. It's likely not about you. They may have another commitment; they may just need a break; they may just not want to be around other people. Accept that they have the right to do that and move on. 

And if you're concerned or really want to know why, just ask. Don't assume. I assume way too much and it's never a good thing.

And these weekend reflections? These are my rambles. My thoughts. They help me work through issues or ideas or thoughts I am having. If you see something in them that resonated with you, ask yourself, "Why?" And then reflect and you may gain a better understanding of yourself or compassion for someone else.

Planning...this week. Christmas seems early this year. I've struggled in finding my Christmas spirit, but I love that my boys have it.

Gratitude...for a wise husband, who through his own struggles and learning has gained wisdom and knowledge that he shares as he counsels and helps others.

From my world... 

Hoar Frost is surreal to see at a distance, but absolutely beautiful up close.

What about you? What are you reflecting on this week? How has your week gone?

1 comment:

  1. It's cold here too - we had snow yesterday and today - so I'm not happy. This is really unusual for us in December.

    Yes, everyone has issues and we all need to remember that when we are dealing with others.